You must be getting old, Dicky. I saw you look at the wine list before the waitress ...
NO CAPTION INSIDE
Post and Packing will be added to your bill. 1 card £0.35, 3-5 Cards £1.00, 6-12 Cards £1.75,13-20 cards £2.50, 21-30 Cards £3.50 (UK) Overseas at cost Price: £1.75
If you want a reply from him, you'll have to talk to him via text or instant messaging ...
Where is this recycling of household waste going to stop? ...
'SAILING: The fine art of getting wet and becoming ill while slowly going nowhere at great expense ...'
THE PLEASURES OF GARDENING ...
..Being pricked by thorny things ...
...being stung by stingy things ...
...Being stuck to by sticky things ...
...Being bitten by buzzy things ...
A woman's life can feel like performing a juggling act whilst rifing a unicycle through a ploughed field ...
CAPTION INSIDE: Sometimes we just have to priortise...
It amazes me the lengths to which a man will go to avoid going outside to fetch a ladder ...
It's much quicker if you just pick the ball up and stick it in the hole. There! Can we go for lunch now? ...
WELCOME TO YOUR NEW HOME
Surely you can't have forgotten which box you packed your husband in ...
BLANK INSIDE
You'll have to back up / Why can't you - there's a passing place behind you / I don't do reverse ...
Never too old to ... enjoy childish pranks ...
Never too old to ... jump in a puddle
Never too old to ... slide down the bannisters ...
A STRIKING PAIR WITH SPLENDID PROVENANCE ... This tallboy with dentil cornice and fully fitted interior has one or two later additions. Cindition average for the period. Supported on original club legs and pad feet
A large bow-fronted chest with slightly over-stuffed seat and tapering block feet. Difficult to age. Excellant value
To my deafness I'm accustomed, To my dentures I'm resigned, I can manage my bifocals, But Oh! How I miss my mind ... (can't remember who wrote this..)
BLANK
HE DRINKS WINE Admire it ..Swirl it about a bit ..sniff it ..nod knowlingly .. imbibe it loudly .. savour the price of it ..
SHE DRINKS WINE Pour it .. swig it .. pour it .. swig it .. pour it .. swig it ..
Do you know what makes you the perfect wife? / It's the fact that you've never forgotten my birthday... / .. and you've never remembered my age ...
A quick kiss burns up 3 calories ... each of these doughnuts contains 200 calories ... so providing I kiss each one 66.67 times, I can eat them all without feeling guilty ...
THIS IS A DOUBLE FOLD CARD
Post and Packing will be added to your bill. 1 card £0.35, 3-5 Cards £1.00, 6-12 Cards £1.75,13-20 cards £2.50, 21-30 Cards £3.50 (UK) Overseas at cost Price: £1.95
I'm not writing a thank you letter for dinner - I'm writing a letter of complaint ...
Laundry power games ...
Never too old to ... lick out the icing bowl ...
How on earth do people without horseboxes cope with trips to the bottle bank? ..
When it's good to be the third person in a marriage ...
When one of us dies, I'm going to go and live in the South of France ...
Ah! Slobber - that'll be Dicky back from his trip ... / Welcome home, darling!
TRUE LOVE
Do you know-we've been married for over forty years and I've never won an argument... / I know ...
CAPTION INSIDE READS:
...you've never been right
IN TIMES OF STRESS ...
Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, The courage to change the things I cannot accept and the wisdom to hide the bodies of those I had to kill today because they got on my nerves. Also help me to be careful of the toes I tread on today as they might be connected to the feet I have to kiss tomorrow. Help me always to give 100% .. 12 % on Monday, 23% on Tuesday, 40% on Wednesday, 20% on Thursday and 5% on Friday ...
CAPTION INSIDE: And help me to remember .. when I'm having a bad day and it seems that people are trying to wind me up .. that it takes 42 muscles to frown and only 28 to smile ...
THE FOUR AGES OF MAN Lager .. Aga .. Saga .. Gaga ..
"Shall we stick another dog on the bed - I'm still freezing ..."
Quiet, Daffy - there's only five minutes of the film left ...
..whats happened so far? ..
What's the point of all your hard work in the garden if I'm not allowed to sit down and enjoy it ..?
"What do you mean 'get a grip'? Your bum's in my face, you've spilt my gin and my hair's gone frizzy ..."
"Darling - it's Hello! magazine on the phone - they'd like to photograph us in our gracious home ..."
THE MALE AND FEMALE CHARACTERS He makes coffee ...She makes coffee ...
Top image on cover, bottom image on inside
THE GUEST FROM HELL
Mars and Venus mow the lawn ...
THE WHO'S DRIVING TONIGHT DEBATE
GRANDCHILDREN ... The dream ... The reality ...
"The future's not what it used to be, Dicky ..."
Post and Packing will be added to your bill. 1 card £0.35, 3-5 Cards £1.00, 6-12 Cards £1.75,13-20 cards £2.50, 21-30 Cards £3.50 (UK) overseas at cost Price: £1.75
THE FEMALE CHARACTER The ability to see facts from whichever angle suits her best.
No Dicky ... I've put you here ... between Grizelda and Jane ...
"Emergency services? Two large Bloody Marys, please ..."
THE PERFECT MARRIAGE / Being supportive ... / dealing with problems together ...
making time to listen to each other ... / keeping active in the bed department ...
"You can't expect me to be in perfect shape yet, I've just had a grandchild ..."
"I don't think the bed scenes are very realistic ..."
GOLF CLUB DAFFYNITIONS Interlocking grip, Driver, Pitching wedge, Putter, Texas wedge, A Niblick, A Mashie, Big Bertha, Spoon
IMAGE ON FRONT & BACK OF CARD
CAPTION READS
Just Graduated!
FASHION DAFFYNITIONS Side zip, ruched blouse, peplum flare, looped pashina, negligee, bootleg, high heels, low slung belt, palazzo pants
I couldn't find a gadget you don't already have so I decided to make one ...
Caption inside: Happy Father's Day
It's Halloween; time to get carried away!
Message inside reads: With Best Wishes for Christmas and the New Year
Post and Packing will be added to your bill. £0.80 per pack (UK) £1.50 EU £2.00 Z1 & Z2 Discount for 2 or more packs. Price: £4.25
Message inside reads: Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year
Post and Packing will be added to your bill. £0.80 per pack (UK) £1.50 EU £2.00 Z1 & Z2 Discount for 2 or more packs. Price: £5.50
Message inside reads: With every good wish for Christmas and the New Year
Large measures 12ins x 16 ins (30cm x 40cm) Small measures 9ins x 7ins (22.5cm x 27.5cm)
Post and Packing will be added to your bill. Large £1.00 per pack, Small £0.70 (UK) - Large £1.95, Small £1.20 EU - Large £2.95, Small £2.00 Z1 & Z2 Discount for 2 or more packs.